Have you ever wanted to pursue something and thought about it over and over but ultimately talked yourself out of it and convinced yourself that you just wouldn’t be able to do it or would plain out fail?
Over the years, I have definitely sabotaged myself and totally convinced myself that I wasn’t smart enough or capable to do certain things, so I just didn’t even attempt them.
Like so many other empty nesters that I have spoken with, all the free time not carpooling , no longer volunteering at school or going to sporting events, etc had left a void that i wasn’t sure how I wanted to fill. I worried that my kids only saw me as a a mom, carpool driver and their personal chef. I finally had the time to do some of the things that I always wanted to do, but didn’t act on them. It was time to just dive head first and finally follow through.
What was stopping me? Not my wonderful husband who is always my cheerleader, but fear. Fear was stopping me, and i had to get over that!
Sitting at the dinner table with my college age daughter one night gave me my “aha” moment. We were discussing her classes, possible careers after college or whether grad school might be a good choice. I kept hearing negatives come out of her mouth about how hard it would be and so long and so much work. This reminded me of the many conversations I had with my mom when I was younger, which is what made me realize I had to create a different outcome. I knew then that I had to get out of my comfort zone and show her that I could do something that really scared me to death. Sitting in a classroom again after 30 years and taking tests was something I didn’t know if I could do and be successful. I wanted her to know that she needed to decide what she wants to do and go after it.
Fear was still controlling me and I had so many questions about how the class went, what it entailed and how I would get though it and remember all content. I’d be lying if I didn’t think I might need ADD medicine to remember everything. (Yes, I did make that humiliating phone call to my doctor only to end in a few laughs and a prescription for coffee)
I met with a friend and picked her brain as soon as I decided to take the leap and sign up for the class. She was not only helpful but so very encouraging! Our initial meeting was at Starbucks and it became my daily go to spot to study and commiserate with a fellow classmate.
I got back into my student mode and committed 100 percent. This meant studying all the time! I found myself totally interested in all of the information, which was something I don’t remember from my college days. I also turned off my phone for 4 hours every day and my family (barely) survived! I would power up my phone after class and laugh at many of the family texts that I missed especially ones that said “ is anyone else mad that mom isn’t available to answer out texts?”. Yes, mom was doing something for herself for once and it felt really good.
When my phone was turned back on, I was glued to it! Still not answering my families texts, but using the various review apps that I found available. Real estate for Dummies and the Dearborn real estate were my favorites .I was even soaking in the tub at night doing review tests! Many of the questions that were on the apps were actually on the test.
5 weeks, 3 tests later and a whole lot of studying, I took the state exam and passed!!! Don’t get me wrong, I know people do it everyday but it was MY day and it felt really good. My family was so excited for me but more importantly I was so excited for me! I got out of my comfort zone and not only showed my kids what I could do but in the end more importantly showed myself.
This time of year it seems like everyone is making their new years resolutions. This year my wish for you is that you get out of your comfort zone and do something that you have always wanted to do and do it for yourself! Resolve to stop sabotaging your success!
Now on to using my new license! I’m starting my business out as a referral agent/ Global real estate advisor. If you or anyone, no matter the location, is looking to buy or sell, reach out to me and I am happy to help. Contact me and I will connect you with some of the best agents worldwide!
